The past few days have been a bit crazy, I have been running on grace and grace alone. Today being Ash Wednesday, well it will be yesterday at least by time you read this, I hit the wall. I’m not complaining, I’m grateful. But for a woman who gave a talk on Tuesday night entitled “Too Busy for Lent,” I guessI know more about…

Lent. The word looms over us! Lent is an invitation to all, a seeming impossibility for some, a feeling of dread for a few and a mystery for others. Lent – 40 days of hope stands before us now. Lent, a time of promise and fulfillment; God as ever, waiting for us to respond to God’s invitation.

What will we say or do in response to God come this day, this Ash Wednesday?

When asked by a journalist, what might be the greatest of our spiritual ills, the prolific monk,author and contemplative from the Abbey of Gethsemani, Thomas Merton replied
(please proceed to the TU blog page.)

In any case, if you are here, chances are that you know me, so this post will be redundant to you in some ways. Feel free to keep on reading if you wish.

There is an element of bittersweet going on here, but I am very pleased to have the larger platform to blog from. When Mike Huber, the interactive audience manager and overall boss o’ the bloggers there contacted me, I was a bit shocked! It took me a day to sort out the pros and cons, and I feel great that about making the move.  I do hope that if you are reading this, you will come over and read at the Times Union blog pages as well.

The comments are all moderated; it is a newspaper blog, so that has to be the policy. Please be patient as I moderate them.  And the aforementioned Mike won’t like it if things get ugly… and neither will I, so let’s keep that in mind.

In any case, here we go…. 3…2…1…

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Hello Times Union blog readers! I’d like to introduce myself to you today. My name is Fran Rossi Szpylczyn, I’m a long-time blogger who is new to the TU blogs, and looking forward to connecting with you via these pages. I am so pleased to be here; what a privilege it is to be part of the expansive company of Times Union bloggers.

So, who am I?

I live in Clifton Park with my husband Mark Szpylczyn and my stepdaughter Erica. We have a dog and a cat who like to ignore each other, which is a good thing! Born in the Bronx, I grew up in White Plains, NY and spent most of my life in the New York City area. The bulk of my work life was spent working (Please click this link to head over to the TU blog page now…)

Today’s Gospel from Mark reminds us – well it reminds me, anyway – of some pretty important words. They are:

“I do believe, help my unbelief!”

Do I believe? Of course I do! Do I have many moments of unbelief? Of course I do! Not conscious, oh-I-do-not-believe moments, but how about all the times I feel hopeless, helpless and filled with despair?

These words are a reminder that believing happens on a continuum, they are not a simple stop on the journey. So it is with a faith that is relational.

And while I am a woman of faith, I need help all the time!

Don’t you?

(For the record, I did *not* believe that I could make it up those steps. Worse yet, once I did, I did *not* believe that I could come down those steps. I lived  to tell the tale of both! God definitely helped my unbelief that day, a day that changed my life.)

The launch will be on Tuesday, so I have a lot of work to do. The blog break will continue!

There is another piece of news, but while breaking it has not yet fully broken! I will keep you posted!

Karla is Mattyboy’s sister and Mattyboy is blogger zero for me. It kind of all started with him and he will always have a special place in my heart.

Anyway, I’ve gotten to know Karla via Facebook and we have some lively and spirited conversations. We have very different points of view, but we share a love of critical thinking and… well, spirited conversation! It was great to meet her and we had a wonderful time eating lunch at Kripalu. (Oh food, how I love you so. Healthy food, good food, beautiful, organic food.)

We also went poking around and found the mosaic of St. Ignatius of Loyola, now behind a cloth, but we did see it. Thanks to James Martin, SJ, who filled me in on where and how to find it and to Richard Michaels, one of the founders of Kripalu, for good background on why the mosaic is still there. Now that I am blessed to know both Jim Martin AND Richard Michaels and that they were in conversation on my little Facebook page regarding my time at Kripalu with Karla… well that just makes me smile.

Now to my complaining. I am pretty tired of all the everything going on in the world and while I am celebrating the diversity of conversation here, I am also mourning relationships ended, challenged or shaky, as a result of current events.

As a result, I think I will take a bit of a blog break. I will be back in a week or so for Lent no doubt.

Be well, play nicely and no fighting kids! And don’t ignore the saint behind the curtain either.

St. Ignatius, I know that you are back there!

They say things like, “what are you thinking?” Or perhaps, “WTF, you can’t be serious!?!” Then there is the “you have become unfamiliar to me. What has the church done to you?” That was followed by, “And you call yourself Catholic?” That’s when I want to say, “Hey, remember me – I am the smoke of satan in the church!”

It goes on and on. And BTW, the majority of correspondence is from people that I know, not anonymous commenters or trolls. Correction: all correspondence on the topic is from people I know.

A few online voices remind me of my own spirit. One is Melinda, very much so in the specific piece I cite here, but in other pieces as well. Another is Todd, in this post. And then there is Meredith – in a very wise post, the one to whom I should really be listening and mirroring. Her questions about whether or not the discourse is focused in the most appropriate place. Yet, foolish or not, I continue to want to (and I don’t think she is saying otherwise) to have a relationship with God through others. And that does include all the people I both agree with and disagree with.

Since when is disagreeing on opinions reason to not associate? Sadly it is these days. *sigh* And then I can’t keep my mouth shut…

This song from The Smiths is aptly titled for me as I consider where and how I continue with what I consider my vocation, my ministry and so much of my life. (That being social media.)

And I post the video because today is the 21st anniversary of the death of Pedro Arrupe, SJ. Arrupe was the 28th Superior General of the Society of Jesus, also known as the Jesuits.

Now I know many people who say the word Jesuit as if it is a swear word, spat out in a low and angry tone. That makes me sad. James Martin, SJ in particular takes a lot of hits in conversations that I often hear.

Somehow I cannot see the Jesuits as agents of evil, although their history, like the history of the Roman Catholic church, is quite complicated. I was more than a little shocked to see one of my googling results for Arrupe, show a link to the 25 most evil people in the world.

*sigh*

In any case, Fr. Arrupe reformed the Society, and had a particular vision of justice and for creating “men and women for others.” His devotion to creating a society where we would follow Christ through service to others was at the heart of his ministry and leadership. (Of course the one blog that I pretty much visit every single day and comment on is People for Others, from Loyola Press.)

There are words attributed to Arrupe that always inspire my own heart and mission and they are:

Nothing is more practical than
finding God, than
falling in Love
in a quite absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination, will affect everything.
It will decide
what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you do with your evenings,
how you spend your weekends,
what you read, whom you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in Love, stay in love,
and it will decide everything.

I also love what Fr. Vincent O’Keefe, SJ says in the video below. When you live this life, it might not make sense – at all – to anyone else. Yesterday’s Facebook fiasco on my page is evidence of that.