Ready or not

am-i-ready-to-face-fears-of-starting-my-own-b-L-f3xoBw24 days, but who’s counting?  Hah. I am. How do I feel? In a word? Terrified. In a phrase, suddenly completely vulnerable and totally unprepared.

Yet, the day is coming, and on that day, we will be going.

If you have not seen the movie The Way, I recommend it. From what I am told it fluctuates starting with wildly inaccurate –  things like who walks on impulse, using someone else’s pack, and wearing jeans? And why don’t people have blisters? Then it becomes apparently quite believable – the walking and walking, the Camino families that form, the daily grind of walking, and the incredible grace and gift of doing just that.

Either way, at this point I am awash in self-doubt, terror, fear, and imagining all sorts of ways that I will be unprepared. This seems to be a most necessary step and invitation of being a peregrina on The Way.

(Note: before I wrote this, I had a terrible week for walking. A multitude of reasons had me less than active. Interestingly enough I got in 4 miles this morning, all before 6:30am. And I feel *slightly* less terrified!)


6 thoughts on “Ready or not

  1. Courage, Fran! Take heart! We are praying with/for you as you make your preparations, and we will pray with/for you as you walk.

    As to mad things people do on long walks, I’ll never forget starting the Anapurna trail in the Himalayas with a young pup with a day pack, jeans, tshirt and worn down sneakers (may as well have been flip flops!) and a trash bag with a hole cut into it for the weather we were experiencing!

    I blush to mention that, whilst I was materially prepared, more or less, I was woefully physically underprepared and I rued the day I ever ended up walking with a marathon runner! Still, I made it and oh, what a sense of triumph it was to emerge: what euphoria!

    And how much sweeter it will be for you, I imagine, as a pilgrim . . .

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