War and peace, the Advent edition

To the LORD in the hour of my distress
I call—and he answers me.
“O LORD, save my soul from lying lips,
from the tongue of the deceitful.”
What should he give you, what repay you,
O deceitful tongue?
The warrior’s arrows sharpened,
with red-hot coals from the broom tree!
Alas, that I live in Meshech,
dwell among the tents of Kedar!
I have had enough of dwelling
with those who hate peace.
I am for peace, but when I speak,
they are for war.
Psalm 120

One week ago today, I who –  to quote the psalmist – “am for peace” became consumed with the fire of my own anger. If you do not know what I am talking about, you can read the blog post from that day, but I’m not linking to it. Righteous anger is one thing, but that was something else! Again, referring to the psalm above, “red-hot coals from the broom tree” were

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Still waiting

Thank you for the great response to Saturday’s post about the “gunrack in the manger.” As you can tell, I was full of angst, and while things are not “better,” I am deeply comforted and well informed by comments here, comments at the Albany Times Union version of the blog, and on Facebook. I do not get a lot of Twitter love, but I don’t put a lot into it either. (Oh, there’s fodder for another post!)

Another longer post coming on Monday, but for today, a song. It is the Second Sunday of Advent, light another candle, sink into the sheer, even-if-anxiety-inducing, luxury of sitting still and… waiting. Even if it is just for the length of the video. Enjoy the quiet and the song.

A gun rack in the manger?

Then he summoned his Twelve disciples
and gave them authority over unclean spirits to drive them out
and to cure every disease and every illness.
Jesus sent out these Twelve after instructing them thus,
“Go to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.
As you go, make this proclamation: ‘The Kingdom of heaven is at hand.’
Cure the sick, raise the dead,
cleanse lepers, drive out demons.
Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give.”
-Matthew 10:1, 5A, 6-8

With no plan to post today, some things came up during my prayers earlier, so I am going to put them out here for you. There are lots of readers, but few commenters. That’s fine, I don’t blog for comments, but I am curious what you think and always grateful to see that someone has written something. You all know what I think, I want to know what you think.

During my prayer, I was very aware of how anxious I am right now. The violence of the world has many of us on edge. How I’d like to present myself as cool, calm, and collected, but honestly, I feel extremely shaky. To be clear about this, it is not the incoming violence that I am afraid of. Really – seriously – not at all. There is no fear in my heart from potential acts of terrorism, not one. Maybe it is because of my life, I feel like I have stared enough evil in the eye for several lifetimes – and I think that gives me a certain perspective. As the old  Sondheim song “I’m Still Here” goes:

“Good times and bum times, I’ve seen them all
And, my dear, I’m still here
Plush velvet sometimes
Sometimes just pretzels and beer, but I’m here”

What then am I afraid of? I am afraid of our responses to all the violence around us. Afraid? No, honestly – I am terrified. What have we become? For those among us who claim to be following Christ, I think that we are doing a completely, and I do not use this word lightly, sh*tty job. And we are getting worse.

So here we are in Advent, and instead of Advent peace and waiting, we have cries all around saying that we should arm ourselves and be ready. This is absurd to me, completely absurd. Let’s take this a step further and look at ourselves as Christians who may see what is commonly called “pro-life” as the Cardinal Bernadin (of blessed memory) model of “the seamless garment.” All life is connected and all life is worth dignity and respect. ALL. LIFE. ALL. Sorry, I do not mean to shout, but I get very frustrated about the parsing of what lives are worthy. That’s another post though, back to today.

So if we are followers of Christ, how is it better to take up arms in order to be “ready?” Ready for who? Ready for what? Yesterday I had a conversation with someone and the notion of an armed citizenry walking around with their guns struck as both as patently absurd – and extremely dangerous.

Returning to Advent, back to waiting, back to creating room in our hearts for the coming Christ I can’t help but say – will you prepare your nativity so that it includes a gun rack? Seriously, I cannot for the life of me reconcile the idea that arming ourselves keeps us safer. You want to hunt? Go ahead. Guns for target shooting at a range for sport? Have a great time. But an armed household? I’m lost here, help me. Do not understand.

So what on earth, now that I have ranted, does any of this have to do with today’s Gospel? Let’s take a look again…

Then he summoned his Twelve disciples
and gave them authority over unclean spirits to drive them out
and to cure every disease and every illness.
Jesus sent out these Twelve after instructing them thus,
“Go to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.
As you go, make this proclamation: ‘The Kingdom of heaven is at hand.’
Cure the sick, raise the dead,
cleanse lepers, drive out demons.
Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give.”

Jesus gives his disciples authority to over unclean spirits, to cure every disease and illness. OK, got that. Then Jesus sends them out to find the lost sheep. OK, got that. Cure, raise, cleanse, drive out. Got it.

So what is the problem? Well – I’m not sure how responding to violence with violence fits in with this message. And no, I’m not talking about the response of first responders at this moment, I am talking about you and me packing heat, “just in case” and making decisions to use said “heat” on our own. I’m having visions of road rage, parking lot power plays, and someone grabbing the last early morning doorbuster sales going sour because of the easily availability of a gun. I’m worried that people will start shooting others because they think that person’s faith is a filthy cult and that they must be a danger. I’m worried for mentally ill people at either end of the firearm. I’m just worried.

As we approach the celebration of enfleshment of God, coming as a helpless infant and becoming a man who dies violently – how do we respond? I am really struggling with the fear within me. And yet I know that the only way forth for me is in the hope of Christ.

We are a people in darkness and we know that we have, we do, and we will see a great light. Can we please lay down our arms and go about the real work that we have been given? I’m so anxious, but I’m trying not to be. How can I be this anxious when I see what I have “given without cost.” Today, may I go and “give without cost” to all whom I encounter. Will you join me in Christ? Because I cannot bear the thought of the gun rack in the manger, and please – I cannot do this alone.

This post is dedicated to the children of Sandy Hook, holy innocents for whom we did so little. I am so sorry that we failed you and continue to do so by more shooting, more guns, more fighting and more death. Forgive us, dear children. Forgive us, Lord.

(I am not kidding about what you think. Please respond in the comments. All comments must be approved, so feel free to write one that you do not want approved, but say that up front – I really just want to know. I hope that people speak up. Forgive typos etc, this was really written and posted quickly.)