Worrying

I saw this image about worry and I thought about how true it was, and about how much I give myself over to worry. Frankly, worry and I have an open door policy; it just traipses in whenever the hell it feels like it and I feel powerless to resist. This is not good.

Just yesterday I was driving and I decided to try to listen to the radio. Big mistake, that’s like sending out a signal telling worry to get here ASAP! Anyway, it was too late and suddenly I heard a Republican economist, one that had advised Republican presidents and I clenched my jaw. Until, that is, he began speaking about how terrible the new tax plan was, but that he was certain that it would be both reconciled – and disastrous.  Great – a Republican who thinks that the plan was too hasty and poorly constructed without both parties input, that freaked me out. That opened the door for Worry to stroll in and plop down on the couch of my soul.

Another worry is that I, a person who has contributed a lot of money into Social Security and Medicare, and is so close to reaching them, will be denied this, mostly because Senator Paul Ryan and his ilk really think it is a big drain on the economy. Does he want people to not have health care? I can’t figure it out. Personally, I think that the tax plan will be the big drain; it is still a free country, so I can disagree. At least for the moment.

Yesterday, after listening to a little bit of that economist I shut the radio off , but today I woke up feeling a bit like a heavy, heavy blanket weighed me down. I can’t have coffee this morning (blood work) and that has left me more unfocused than usual, but I sat myself down to pray with the mass readings. The first reading from Isaiah pretty much knocked worry to the ground with a single blow, and restored some hope and joy. The rest of the readings follow suit, with the Gospel reminding us that if anyone every annoyed – and disobeyed – the authorities, it was Jesus. They can call him blasphemer, but Jesus knows what God’s kingdom is meant to be.

Worry is not the best use of our imagination, it drains our life of joy. In this time of holy waiting and watching during Advent, I’m going to pray for less worry and more hope. And like a pregnancy, Advent is a time of preparation – because once that baby comes, we will have a lot to do. So much so that while we need to be in our prayerful moments of waiting now, we can think about how we will deal with what lies ahead.

The political scene promises us nothing, but God gives us hope. Jesus will be born – the Word literally made flesh. If that miracle can happen, one can only imagine what God has in store for us. The only way that will happen is if we all participate in the Kingdom. Are you in?